Our Best (Worst) Thanksgiving Fails

Disastrous Thanksgiving tales from OMA.

by Staff Written

November 22, 2017 at 10:24 am

We love to be thankful around this time of year—even when things don’t always turn out perfectly. It’s amazing how many ways a happy Thanksgiving with family and friends can go wrong. We collected a few good ones from around the office. TBH, some of our stories are a little hard to believe…

Mishaps and Mess Ups

“A few Thanksgivings ago, my mother prepared the turkey like always and threw it on the grill. When she and my sister went outside to baste the thing, she could already see that the flames inside had risen higher than they were supposed to. When the lid was removed, flames were shooting up around the completely scorched bird. That was the first time we had pizza on Thanksgiving.”

“Last year, our oven broke after baking the desserts but before putting the turkey in AND SO THEN we decided to put the turkey on the grill. It was a good fix until my uncle dropped it in the grass trying to get it off the grill!”

“Just your classic case of forgetting to turn the oven on when the turkey went it. I guess that’s better than the year my uncle’s dog bit me which resulted in my dad not speaking to him since. That was in 2008.”
–Anonymous (i.e. definitely NOT Tessa)

“My first solo Thanksgiving, I couldn’t make it home and decided to have a Friendsgiving instead. I enthusiastically bought all the ingredients to make my first turkey. But when I opened the packaging, I realized a rather embarrassing flaw in my otherwise perfect plan: I couldn’t tell which end of the turkey was up. Luckily, a quick call to my grandma cleared things up. That event was far less consequential than the time that my aunt accidentally dumped two giant trays of [our only] mashed potatoes on the floor right before the meal. We salvaged what we could, because Thanksgiving mashed potatoes are life.”

“My mother (she’s in her 70’s) got all new copper Jello molds. When she flipped them after the Jello had set, the copper coating had stuck to the Jello! Needless to say, we did not eat Jello that year.”

Hungry Cats and Questionable Shenanigans

“Before I could cook my turkey, my friend Joey thought it would be funny to stick his head in it and scare me. Instead he ended up getting his head caught.”

My mom’s 8 pound cat ate her way through the 20 pound turkey while nobody was watching. They discovered her sleeping off the meat inside of the turkey.

One year, paleontologists and a mathematician were among a select group chosen to tour an island theme park populated by dinosaurs created from prehistoric DNA. While the park’s mastermind billionaire assured everyone that the facility was safe, they found out otherwise when various ferocious predators broke free and went on the hunt.

“One time I was making a turkey for my son and the cooking channel made it look easy but I burnt it. Then we went to eat at a restaurant instead. Later that night Santa Clause fell off my roof, and because I found his body, I became the Santa Clause. The end.”

“Anytime my mom comes to Thanksgiving.”

Ok, so maybe we aren’t all thankful for the things we go through during this somewhat stressful holiday season year. At the end of the day though, we can always be grateful for the things that go right every year, whether it is pulling off a big complicated dinner or just spending the holiday with the few people we care about most.

No matter what we do to celebrate, when it comes down to the meaning of the day, it’s all about not sweating the small stuff; it’s about getting into the spirit of giving thanks. Even if your turkey is on fire.

November 22, 2017 at 10:24 am

Staff Written